The America I Left Behind: Things I do, and don’t, miss

I’m not sure why it happened but a few nights ago I really started to miss home. I didn’t just start thinking about specific people but more general home. And that lead me to think about all the things that I had back in America that I don’t have here. I have taken the time to jot it all down.

I miss the crap out of my little sister, Katie. It’s a really weird feeling, missing her. She and I usually don’t get along, and that holds true up until a little bit before my leaving. But I miss all that bickering that we used to do. And with Katie being with child, I feel like I should be there. I want to play the stereotypical aunt role, taking pictures of the belly and buying gifts every time I go past a baby shop. It’s like I miss being able to play my role and I hate missing out on everything that she is going through. I cant wait to get home and see her. My inside sources have told me that she is the most beautiful pregnant woman they have seen in a while. I believe it. She was always the most beautiful everything, toddler, girl, teen.

I also really miss my Mommy. I know she’ll be over here in about 30 days but it’s not soon enough. You know, I never understood the vigor of a bond between a mother and child until being over here. I always knew that I loved my mom and I respected her before but now I get. I get that as long as she is with me I will truly feel home.

Of course, I miss my Daddy. I guess it’s not really fair to say that the love that I have for my mom is individual without saying the same for the love for my father. It’s weird. I know that both of my parents love me and I love both of them but I get something different from each. With my dad it’s more like a knight in shinning armor and also the smart ass friend kind of love. With my mom it’s more of mixture between a best friend and a mom.

I miss my big bro, Jake. I look around at all the young people here and think about how well my brother would fit in here. Italy is so his kind of town. They have the whole carefree, laid-back attitude of Jake but they also have the hardworking attitude that he has. He belongs here.

And last but not least, I really miss my Nana. A couple of nights ago my mom called me to tell me that I needed to call my grandma and leave a message on her answering machine because my mom accidentally erased my earlier messages. I really miss sleeping in that same bed with her. I miss feeling so close to someone, not physically but emotionally. I feel like we get each other better than anyone else.

Indubitably, I do miss my family get-togethers. Yeah, I do like being away from the drama but I am so used to all the clamor of us getting together that its weird to be around. And despite the drama, I really do love seeing everyone. It was nice to get to see everyone on my mom’s side, except my lovely Uncle Steve and Uncle Rich, over Christmas. And I got to see all my dad’s family at my going away party. I love it when we all get in one room and take pictures. I absolutely love that I have all these pictures of everyone from a time when we are all happy.

Additionally, I miss my other family, my best friends. I have 6 best friends. Everyone I know including my best friends thinks that its way too many but each one plays a very important role in my life and I could never not consider them to be my best friends. There’s the girls: Lauren &Tran, and the boys: Jeffrey, Jesse, Matt & Ian. Just like they serve different purposes, they are also missed differently. Like Lauren, I miss her stupid giggle, even when she is making fun of me for something. And I miss how easily she is scared. I miss Tran’s facial expression. I miss her voice (weeo weeo weeeeeooo wee). I miss how when I walk next to her she will link arms with me and rest her head on my shoulder. I miss how these two girls are so close to me that we are literally like sisters. For the boys, in general, I miss all the little pranks that they have played on me. In case you all don’t remember, Jeffrey farted in my face when I was sleeping, and there was the time when I woke up with shaving cream all over my face. Or what about the time when I had my head shoved into a cake? Or when there was a new stereotype invented just for me (butter)? And then there are all the little jokes about me not being able to read, Ian. Or that I suck at poker, Jesse. I miss chilling with yall at Suicide Hill or at Jeff’s house. And when Jesse had an apartment, that was great. All in all I just miss kicking it with yall. I miss doing nothing and being so entertained by it.

The food here is so different than back home, duh, and it makes me wish I had my food from back home. I want my Nana’s tortillas, fresh off the comal. I want some of my Dad/Mom’s chili. The two of them make the best chili. Each one does something a little different than the other but both are superb here. I think the only time I have even seen beans were when I was at Titi’s house. in addition to those two things, I would love some of my brother’s salsa. He makes it extra spicy on purpose and I love when he does that. I love burning my tongue off, always fun. And if there were one thing to greet me when I get home it would be GoJo’s yellow sauce. I love that stuff. I could buy it by the bucket when I’m in KC. Love that stuff.

Oh, and don’t get me started on the places that I miss. I really miss the Plaza. I don’t miss working there but just being there. I’ve had a lot of really good times at the plaza and the ambiance is truly stunning. I had a dream about the building that the Cheesecake Factory is located in and it was painted red. Random, I know, but it just reminded me of how much I love the Plaza and would love to stroll around it. I’m sure it will remind me of being away.

I also really miss Suicide Hill. My friends and I would go there all the time. I love it on the top of that hill, sitting on the swing and looking at the stars. I always did my best thinking up there. And I always had my best conversations with friends up there. I don’t know if anyone remembers this but we were talking about endangered animals. We’re too smart for our own good.

I miss being at my Nana’s house. I miss the smell of tortillas cooking. I miss hearing the vacuum going. I miss being awakened at 6 in the morning because she had to get up and shower and clean. I miss seeing kids running around the house, specifically ReRe and Marieclaire.

I miss the comfort of my Dad’s couch. I would love coming back from Columbia and falling asleep on his couch. There would be the TV going on in the foreground and possibly Katie yelling in the background. It was always so nice to find refuge on that couch.

But you know what my favorite place is in Kansas City: My mommy’s bathtub. The only thing I can think to do when I get home is take a bath. If you want to talk to me you’ll have to do so on the outside of the curtain that creates such a perfect divider between the heavenly bathtub and the chaotic world. We don’t have baths here and naturally, all I want is to take a bath.

I left all of my movies in Kansas City so I really miss that. I’ve bought a few but they don’t make up for the 100 or so that I have back home. I love Italian cinema but they aren’t so happy go lucky as America. We almost always have a happy ending in our movies and they only have half happy endings. I guess it’s nice to buy movies in Italian though. I’ve bought ones that I have in English and know by heart so that I can learn.

And movies just make me think of quality time. One thing that I don’t have over here is quality time around a table with cards and chips. I miss playing Rummy and Poker. I miss playing SORRY! And I really miss sitting around a TV all scrunched on a couch with a bowl of popcorn watching Dead Silence or some other movie. Does anyone remember the time that we were watching Ice Age and Nana was laughing at us for watching cartoons? She said that we were stupid for watching cartoons. I have a picture of here laughing. Check it out.


I really miss the dollar. What happened to the dollar being the strongest form of currency? It sucks that I am over here and my money isn’t worth anything. I hate that I spend so much money without feeling like I’ve spent anything. I’m gonna start collecting dollars (or as you all in America say it, “saving money”) and then I’m gonna throw it all in a bathtub and swim in it.

So, I’m kind of a whore for kitchen appliances; I think I have every single appliance under the sun and if a new one comes out I want it. Being over here, I am without so many things that I took for granted. If there were a few that I would have brought with me it would be my rice cooker and my quesadilla maker. It’s a good thing I didn’t because all I would be eating would be rice and quesadillas if I did bring those.

In addition to those appliances, I also miss the convenience of a toaster oven or a microwave. Here, if you want to heat something up you either have to put it in the oven or you have to put it on the stove. It’s not the worst thing to ever happen but it would be easier to just have a toaster oven or microwave. And you know what else would be convenient? A garbage disposal. I would love to not worry about clogging up my drain and be able to just throw it all down the sink but I cant. When I get home I think I’m just gonna start throwing food down the drain, not cause I don’t want it, just cause I can.

But more than anything in the whole, wide world, I just miss being at home. Sure there are all of those little things that lead to me missing home, and I’m not really home sick, but if I could have both Rome and the things I love about KC at the same time I would be all over it. Dorthy says it best, “There’s no place like home.”

Things I am glad to be rid of
One of the major things I am happy is not over here is the gas guzzling cars. There are a few people who have big cars but the majority of people drive really tiny cars. If I ever really live over here I want to get a Fiat Cinquecento. They are sooo cute. I would look into the safety features, of course, but the looks are a seller.

I’m also really glad to be rid of having a fast food restaurant on every corner. They have their share of McDonald’s and Burger King but that’s it. And you don’t see them in close proximity. Back home they are everywhere and it’s such an eye sore. Here they at least try to make them look spectacular, so that you’ll want to go in. Renato, our student services officer, loves McDonald’s and Burger King. It’s a little odd but to each his own.

I know that this might be super repetitive but I am so glad to be away from any of the drama that always seems to run along side my family. I swear, if we go 60 days without something dramatic happening it’ll be a first. My grandfather’s one wish was that we all get along and it seems like even in his death we cant manage to make that happen. I know that my family is not individual in having this trait but I’m just happy to not be in it.